Recently we have been working on descriptive writing that shows, not tells.
This means that we write really clear descriptions without telling the reader what we are actually describing. We can use our 5 senses to add detail to our descriptions.
Here is some of our writing.
As we open the door a gust of cold air hit our faces. Cars are covered in frost and the roads are black with ice. Kids are throwing snow balls around. I can smell soup and hot chocolate. We sit by the fire watching movies and playing games together.
By Jahvarn.
It is a cold day and there is frost on the grass and you might slip on the concrete. It might be slippery and windy causing cars to slide down the road fast. The concrete is white with snow and lakes turn to ice.
By Joseph.
Big blue waves crashing against huge black rocks like flashing lightening. They're twirling like a colossal corkscrew. Surfers riding through the waves. People bathing in the blistering hot shining sun on the golden grains of sand. Families building beautiful sand castles. You can hear kids screaming loudly like a blow horn while playing touch, volleyball and tag. Dogs barking while their owners throw an orange frisbee. Families having a yummy picnic and having fun in the sun.
By Te Whatu Pounamu
There were huge crowds gathering around me, shouting, screaming and playing music. People were jumping in the air. Pushing and shoving to get a signature. Seeing the All Blacks made me so happy. I can smell chips and hot dogs around me.
By Akamura
An unmade bed and dishes stacked up in the corner of the room. Standing in the middle of a pile of dirty clothes. There is rubbish, like lolly wrappers lying on the floor and someones dirty shoes have walked over the carpet. All of the drawers are pulled out and looking disgraceful. Toys are scattered around the room.
By Joe
